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Friday, April 18, 2014

Workforce or Work Forced? Metal about Work and Stats on Worldwide Paid Time Off!

“I’m an early bird, and I’m a night owl. So... I’m wise AND I have worms.

Steve Carell as Michael, The Office

 I’d almost forgotten how great the show The Office is. Somehow it makes working in an office seem somewhat endearing, entertaining, and worthwhile. I’m watching season II currently and I’m finding myself laugh out loud more than I have at several other shows I have seen recently combined. I thought it would be fun to make a short post on 2 work themed metal songs.

 Dethklok – Briefcase Full of Guts

(Lyrics from

Punch your card 'cause your working day has started
and you're pushing hard for employee of the month
You got your tools of business and
They're bloodied by your clients and
You're off to work with your
Briefcase full of guts

Door to door you are searching for a buyer
Who will take the terms of your policy

You got an invitation to their living room
You're gonna demonstrate your products privately

You know that

I'm an employee
I have a degree
I'll fulfill your need
I will make you bleed
I'll rise to the top
Best one on the team
Kill outside the box
Hold you as you scream

I'll divide you into pieces
Sell them back and raise the price
Make a profit off your interests
You'll increase my sales tonight

I will increase
I must increase

A.B.K. [4x]
(Always Be Killing)

I'm an employee
I have a degree
I'll fulfill your need
I will make you bleed
I'll rise to the top
Best one on the team
Kill outside the box
Hold you as you scream

Thanks to Lance Dalt for adding these lyrics.

This is a literal approach to music about the dreaded workweek. I find it highly entertaining and will not elaborate anymore on it. Learn the lyrics and sing them under your breath at your maggot job!!

 Another take on how work makes us want to gouge our eyes out with an envelope opener is by the One and Only, Arch Enemy...

 Arch Enemy – Night Falls Fast

 (Lyrics from

This earth speaks of darkness
To come in the blood of man
The air breathing poison
All waters running black

Until the sun rises and set on death
The sky burns red like sheer hate
The light in our eyes will fade
To join the darkness of our souls

The earth is losing its light
Night falls fast
Watch the dying sun
We are lost

No angel dares to land
In this hell of mankind’s making
Buried all beauty in our foulness
Nature begins to shine its fury

Until the sun rises and sets on death
The sky burns red like sheer hate

[Harmony – Michael & Christopher] [Lead – Michael] [Lead – Christopher]
Night falls fast upon mankind
Pray for the dead

The sky burns red
Like sheer hate 

Writer(s): Angela Gossow, Michael Amott, Christopher Amott, Daniel Erlandsson
Copyright: Savage Messiah Songs

Again, learn the lyrics and growl at the menacing work that lies ahead of you!

One of the great things about metal lyrics is a lot of times they are about brutality in general. Some have specific events in mind, but others are poetic and left open for interpretation. In this case, I feel that the lyrics of Night Falls Fast can be interpreted as a metaphor for the monotony of employment in the United States of America. Day in, day out, we spend our precious lives working for some higher entity or another. Countless hours spent in a cubicle, behind a register, preparing food, taxes, spreadsheets, presentations, etc. Etc. ETC! 

Night falls much too fast for all of us as we waste away our unappreciated beautiful earthly days chasing the American Dream. Sure, some of us get a couple weeks a year of paid time off, but want to learn something new?

According to Mercer Human Resource Consulting, unlike many other nations worldwide, the USA and Canada "are amongst the least generous nations when it comes to statutory [paid] holidays"¹, and rank at the very bottom of their list for Holiday Entitlements Around the World.

Guess who is MOST generous with paid time off?? 
(View the whole list here: Mercer: Employee Holiday Entitlements Around The World, it's fascinating!)

Top 10
United Kingdom

In that order!

This is not to say that these statistics are directly related to the results of the World Happiness Report, but maybe they do!! (view the summary of the World Happiness Report for 2013 here, or view the full report in Online PDF form here)

We sure could afford to take a moment and look at how we treat our workforce in the USA. Our workforce should not be forced work, but should be the collaborative teamwork of all citizens in our country working towards the common goal of a better economy, political structure, artistic community, educated population, etc. Yes, we live in a free country where we choose what we do for a living, however, we also have the power to choose to treat our workforce better than we do.

A full rant on how the USA handles it's workforce, public service, and education systems is definitely for another day. For now though, I do hope you've enjoyed these songs, and maybe learned something new! Share your thoughts or contribute other brutal songs about slaving away at the timeclock!

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